I read an article today and it really bothered me.  Not because I didn’t agree with the author – in fact quite the contrary, I wholeheartedly agree with the author.  It’s just the way the author went about proving her point that lost me.

The_Stir is the author and the article was written in response to this letter, in which a childless woman suggests that all stay at home moms must have a pact of silence about the awesome lives they lead eating bon bons and relaxing and just use our children as an excuse to get out of the things we feel like.

Obviously, I have quite a few things to say to THAT author, but in the interest of making this not read like a novel, I will skip ahead to the article countering the notion that all stay at home moms are somehow lazy or playing at the park all day.  This article by The_Stir is a minute-by-minute playback of a day in the life of a SAHM and even the first few paragraphs had me shaking my head.

Why?  Because the woman seemingly makes her day harder than it needs to be, packs in TWO playdates, a ballet class, a grocery store trip and indulges her older child in acts that backfire almost instantaneously.  Surely, that can’t be her normal day.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for extra-curricular activities, including ballet, sports, art class, you name it.  But, when you’re struggling to put breakfast on the table with a toddler and a baby, why would you schedule a class in the middle of the morning?  And then offer to pick up another child and take them as well?  And then having an impromptu playdate afterwards?  And then not having the ingredients for dinner and having to rush to the store with restless kids?  And then having another impromptu playdate on the way home from the grocery store?  The whole scenario had me shaking my head.

Of course, these kinds of days do happen.  I have two children roughly the same age as the author and I’ve definitely had those days, every SAHM has.   You know, those days when you offer to pick up a friend’s child and then things get crazy and there’s blowout diapers, tantrums, etc.  But to act like this is your daily routine?  No one is that crazy.

If you really want to counter an article and let her know that parenting can be tough, really tough, don’t go about it by exaggerating your stressful day and acting like this is the norm.  I wouldn’t counter a SAHM’s article with a day from my old corporate job that was a break from the norm with a series of 17 business meetings, interviews, etc.  I would instead talk about all the disruptions in my day that would leave me working all hours of the night when everyone else was long gone.

I would tell of the times when we had deliveries coming at the same time as employees were all waiting for paychecks (which happened every Friday), but I wouldn’t use the day that the large delivery truck caught on fire in front of my office and we were all evacuating while trying to control the fire before the fire department got there as my example.  That story is something we tell over dinner, something that gets people laughing at the craziness of the day, not as a reflection of our day to day job.

To act like a victim in your day when clearly you took on more than you can handle just kind of irks me.  We all make mistakes and take on more than we can handle at times, but of course this isn’t the norm.  And, of course, those are the days you ask your hubby to help, you simply make a less fancy meal, or you just order pizza.

Yes, being a SAHM can be stressful, it can be crazy busy, and it can often be thankless.  But, hopefully you have also made some time in your schedule to allow your children some quality time with you, their mother.  Hopefully you aren’t so busy rushing from class to playdate to grocery to playdate to really enjoy your children and delight in all the many things they are learning every day.

What do you think of the article?  Am I overreacting?