A while ago, my friend Louise relayed that she was horrified to learn that a woman she knows “unfriends” people on Facebook who brag about their kids a lot. Louise explained that she loves sharing news about her children and also hearing about other people’s kiddos. While I couldn’t agree more, I completely get where her friend is coming from.
I don’t have a problem with parents who use their status updates to talk about the cool stuff their kids do. But there is one condition – I better be hearing some of the bad stuff too. I love learning that little Johnny won MVP in the championship game, but I hope to also hear when little Johnny is sent to the office for giving his teacher the finger. If I’m getting all of the good, and none of the bad – well, that might qualify as annoying. If all I’m hearing about is your fabulous life, adoring husband and academically gifted children, I’m either rolling my eyes or throwing up a little in my mouth. If sickly sweet is the only thing being served up, I can find it hard to stomach.
It’s also interesting to consider what accomplishments we see as ‘bragable’. I’m as thrilled as the next parent when my kid manages to get balls in nets or cross finish lines before the friends do. Sometimes I’ll post about my pride. However, I do try to focus my bragging moments on the stuff that really matters – when they do something kind, thoughtful or empathetic. Those are the things that are worth sharing and celebrating. I recently posted on Facebook about my 12-year-old son who had offered to help my 97-year-old grandfather with a rather unpleasant task – one that most adults find difficult. Offering assistance to his elderly great-grandpa – well, that was brag worthy. Seems Facebook agreed – I’ve never seen so many “likes” in my history on that site.
My friend Stephanie recently posted about her father and I think it’s a shining example of appropriate bragging.
Stephanie SassyModernmom:
Can I just brag about my Dad? A 70-year-old man. Retired. In pain every day. While “wintering” in Florida, he spends every single Monday building houses for Habitat for Humanity. How cool is that?
What is your tolerance for bragging – annoying or awesome?
6 Responses to Bragging on Facebook – Annoying or Acceptable?
I fully agree. I totally get that as parents we can’t help but want to brag about everything – big or small – our children accomplish because it’s embedded in us. We’re so proud!
But at the same time, yes, I would like to see other news too. The real stuff, the ups and downs or parenting. This makes me relate to that person more and not feeling like they just want to shove all the good stuff in my face meanwhile my daughter just finished colouring all over her bedroom walls with permanent marker she happened to come across. :/
Great post!
If I’m proud of something my child has accomplished, you’re darned right I’m going to brag, but I also mention naughty stuff too from time to time.
It’s interesting that you wrote this though – recently I posed a similar question on Twitter because I noticed that whenever I post my photographic work on my business page (and not in a braggy way, I think) that I lose fans. I don’t understand why someone would ‘unlike’ my page because I posted a picture of a sweet newborn baby!
Perhaps that’s a whole other topic though.
JG – that is FASCINATING about losing fans when you post a picture!! I never would have thought!
I comment all the time on my LO, with pics. Everyone seems to enjoy the updates, at least they keep telling me to do it. I think that if someone de-friends you for the posts, they probably weren’t very good friends.
I rarely talk about my 4 kids on my profile; I think it’s more about privacy for me and my kids. My 13 year old doesn’t appreciate his mom leaving love notes or tagging him in a brag-up for all his friends to read on his FB profile. A lot of people have FB profiles for family or friends who live at a distance so sharing pictures and updates is a normal expectation. As long as there’s a good mix of update material then I don’t see a problem with it; it’s their profile after-all. I think people are guilty of bragging up various parts of their lives in gerneral, not just their kids, on their FB updates so I don’t see how bragging up your kids is any different. I love seeing cute little baby faces anyway; I don’t mind.
I couldn’t agree with you more, Julie! Great post!
I’ve been told by a former colleague of mine (who happens to be male) that I post too many updates about my 3 year old. The thing is, I live 11 hours away from family and FB is really the only way they get to see what is going on in our life. I rarely post her accomplishments though. It’s mostly how batty she’s driving me or what the latest embarrassing thing she’s said in public is. Just kidding. I do also post about how sweet and loving she is. Mostly it’s about how crazy the comments she comes up with are though.
The friend who told me I post too much about my DD has recently had a son. He and his wife now post about their baby boy ALL the time. I love reading the posts and don’t begrudge them for being proud parents. LOL! There’s one thing about being excited parents, and another being parents who BRAG
I also post about things that are important to me…like preemie awareness, community events, charity involvement, etc.